10 Movies That Make Me Lose the Will to Live

It’s not that these movies are completely unwatchable – some of them might look pretty.  It’s just that evening thinking about these things seems to make me question where my soul has gone.

1.  2001 – A Space Odyssey

“I’m afraid I can’t do that Dave”.  the only thing that is even remotely memorable from this snorefest.  It might have been wonderful movie making technology in 1968, but its a sure cure for insomnia today.

2.  The Lord of the Rings Trilogy

I think the problem is the original material they are dealing with.  I have tried 3 different times to read the Lord of the Rings books and after 30 minutes I’m still on page 3 and can’t concentrate on the material so I quit.  The movies put me to sleep.

3.  Anything by Quentin Tarantino

I don’t know where this guy grew up – and heaven forfend that anybody else still lives there.  After hearing about the Kill Bill movies I didn’t even watch.  Pulp Fiction was disgusting, degrading filth; Reservior Dogs was a gory mess – its just not even worth wasting your time watching anything he’s involved with.

4.  An Affair to Remember

Cary Grant plays the character of our New President Messiah today.  Too cool for school smartass who thinks he’s smarter than anybody in the room.  And there’s a reason men don’t get this movie – its boring beyond words.

5.  The new Oceans Movies

The first one was interesting only to see that Chinese guy fold himself in half.  The rest are just a bunch of Hollyweird twits walking around and earning millions of dollars for looking pretty.

6.  Lost in Translation

So an all-expenses paid vacation in a high-tech luxury world is too much for you Scarlett?  Try working for an actual living and then see what you have to whine about.  And does anybody in the universe believe that somebody like her would end up with a dead-looking Bill Murray?

7.  Sabrina

And I mean both the original with Audrey Hepburn from before I was born and especially the excruciating remake with Harrison Ford as “wooden guy who has no expression”.  Time actually reverses itself as this thing is being watched thus trapping you in an eternal loop of despair and boredom.

8.  Any of the “Home Alone” movies

The smack of steel against flesh.  And the conceit that little twerps are always smarter than adults.  Begone you little twit – and take your ignorant parents with you!

9.  Anything by Woody Allen since Annie Hall

Yes, we get it.  You like New York and young girls.  Very young girls.  You are a dirty old man.  Other than that you haven’t said anything worth noting in decades.  Just play your clarinet and leave us alone.

10.  The Way We Were

Pretty much anywith with Babs is unwatchable pap, but this one takes the cake.  Commies win WWII and make movies while cheating on their spouses and being spied on by Joe McCarthy.  With that song which will make your ears bleed.

2008 – Idiot Liberal Quotes of the Year

1.  Idiot Dictator Quote of the year:

Naomi Cambell interviews Hugo Chavez

Elsewhere, Chavez found time to defend Venezuela’s human rights record and vaunt his country’s oil reserves, but also gave his views on less weighty matters like fashion, pop music and the British royal family.

Cuba’s Fidel Castro was the world’s most stylish leader, he said (“His uniform is impeccable. His boots are polished. His beard is elegant”), he was aware of the newly-reformed Spice Girls and admired Britain’s Prince Charles.

He also refused to rule out following Russian President Vladimir Putin’s example and posing for topless photographs. “Why not? Touch my muscles,” he reportedly told the supermodel.

chavez_penn

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2.  Hillary Doozy of the Year

ABC News’ Eloise Harper Reports: Senator Hillary Clinton, in an interview with ABC News’ Cynthia McFadden for ABC News’ Nightline, was asked about President Clinton’s controversial comments about race and Senator Obama  in the past weeks. Clinton apologized for her husband.

“I think whatever he said which was certainly never intended to cause any kind of offense to anyone,” Clinton said, “if it did give offenses then I take responsibility and I’m sorry about that.”

“Can you control him?” asked McFadden.

“Oh of course,” Clinton replied.

The Loving Father and Husband

The Loving Father and Husband

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3.  The “Reach Out to the Other Side” Quote of 2008

I Hate Republicans:

I hate the Republican Party and everything it stands for, including, but not limited to, its interest in denying women reproductive health rights, denying children the right to legally recognized two parent homes if their parents are gay, and their not-so-subtle “be afraid of anyone who isn’t pasty white” message.

But I’ve learned to HATE with a passion that I never knew prior to the November 2000 Election, and I will *never* forget it.

Republicans are Evil, and I hate them.

nuclear_blast

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4.  The “I Just Hate People Except for My Six Children” Quote of 2008 – With an Added Bonus Globaloney Warming Kicker

TED TURNER: Not doing it will be catastrophic. We’ll be eight degrees hottest in ten, not ten but 30 or 40 years and basically none of the crops will grow. Most of the people will have died and the rest of us will be cannibals. Civilization will have broken down. The few people left will be living in a failed state — like Somalia or Sudan — and living conditions will be intolerable. The droughts will be so bad there’ll be no more corn grown. Not doing it is suicide. Just like dropping bombs on each other, nuclear weapons is suicide. We’ve got to stop doing the suicidal two things, which are hanging on to our nuclear weapons and after that we’ve got to stabilize the population. When I was born-

CHARLIE ROSE: So what’s wrong with the population?

TURNER: We’re too many people. That’s why we have global warming. We have global warming because too many people are using too much stuff. If there were less people, they’d be using less stuff.

turner_annan

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5.  “All My Liberal Friends Say I’m Completely Unbiased” Award

ABC Media Hack shills now for Obama

“I do like McCain and the people around him, and I consider him still to be a friend. But I have fundamental differences with John McCain on the issues and always have. I don’t have any problem criticizing John McCain….It was no secret to the reporters around me that I have Democratic-leaning views. But they said I was always fair.”
— Former ABC and CBS reporter Linda Douglass, now a spokeswoman for Barack Obama, as quoted by the Washington Post’s Howard Kurtz in a June 16 profile.

abcwntdouglass

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6.  Media Twit of the Year

CBS News journalist Richard Butler said he believes he was kidnapped in Iraq by policemen with sympathies toward the Hezbollah but isn’t entirely sure who held him captive for two months or why.

Butler, a British journalist kidnapped with his interpreter on Feb. 10, was rescued by Iraqi troops on April 14 when he was found with a sack over his head in a house in Basra.

Butler said he felt it was better to be kidnapped in Iraq then taken into custody by Americans in Afghanistan.

“I was pleased I wasn’t being mortarboarded in Guantanamo or being held for six and a half years like an Al-Jazeera cameraman, for instance,” he said.

richard_butler